Blondes
What does a blonde...
What does a blonde put behind her ears to attract men? Her feet
What does a blonde say after sex? Are you guys all on the same team?
What does a blonde do first thing in the morning? She goes home.

How do you...
How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she is pregnant.
How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch-and-sniff on the bottom of the bath tub.
How do you know when a blonde is stressed? There is a tampon behind her ear and who knows where the pencil is.
How do you totally confuse a blonde? Give her a bag of M&M's and tell her to put them into alphabetical order.
How do you get a blonde's eyes to sparkle? Shine a flashlight in her ear.
How do you get a blonde to laugh on Monday? Tell her a joke on Friday.
How do you know when a blonde has been using your word processor? By the white-out on the screen.
How do you give a Blonde a brain transplant? Blow in her ear!
How do you keep a blonde busy? Give her a bag of M&M's and tell her to put them in alphabetical order.

How does a blonde...
How does a Blond get pregnant? And you thought a blond was dumb!!!!!!!!!!!
How does a blonde turn on the light after sex? She opens the car door.

How many blondes does it take to...
How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? Five, one to stir the batter, and four to skin the M&M's.

What...
What did the blonde say after the doctor told her she was pregnant? Are you sure it's mine?
What is the difference between a smart blonde and Big Foot? Big Foot has been sighted.
What is the mating call of a blonde? I think I'm drunk.
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? You pull the pin, and throw it back.
What is the advantage in being married to a blonde? You can park in the handicapped zones.
What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Spot.
What does a Blonde say after you blow in her ear? Thanks for the refill!
What do you call an intelligent blonde? -- A golden retriever! --

What do you call...
What do you call 20 blondes in a circle? A dope ring.
What do you call 6 blondes standing in a row? A wind Tunnel.
What do you call a group of blondes in the freezer? Frosted flakes.
What do you call 12 blondes standing side-to-side? A wind tunnel.
What do you call a zit on a blonde's butt? A brain tumor.
What do you call a brunette between two blondes? An interpreter.

What do blondes and **** have in common/differ?
What do blondes and computers have in common? You never appreciate one until they go down on you.
What do blondes and screen doors have in common? The harder you slam them, the looser they get.
What do blondes and cowpies have in common? The older they get, the easer they are to pick up.
What do blondes and turtles have in common? Once they're on their back, their screwed.
What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up.
What is the difference between a blonde and a 747? Not everyone has been in a 747.
What is the difference between a blonde and a brick? The brick won't follow you around for a week after you lay it!

Why don't blondes...
Why don't blondes like to eat pickles? Their heads get stuck in the jars.
Why don't blondes like to make kool-aid? They can't fit 8 quarts of water into that little package.

Why do/did/does the blonde...
Why did the blonde climb over the chain link fence? To see what was on the other side.
Why did the blonde wash her hair in the kitchen sink? That's where you wash all the vegetables.
Why does the blonde have T.G.I.F on her shoes? Toes Go In First.
Why do the blondes like tilt steering wheels? More head room.
Why did the blonde cross the road? Never mind that, what was she doing out of the bedroom?
Why do the blondes wear panties? To keep their ankles warm.
Why did the blonde have bruises around her belly button? Because there are blonde men in this world, too!
Why do blondes make such lousy farmers? They have so much trouble keeping their calves together.

General...
If a blonde and a brunette both jumped off a building at the same time, who would land first? the brunette, the blonde would have to stop and ask directions.

Two blondes were walking along and came to some tracks. One blonde said 'No, they look like moose tracks.' They were still arguing when the train hit them.

Which is smarter, a dumb blonde, a smart blonde, the Easter bunny, or Santa Clause. The dumb blonde...there's no such thing as the Easter bunny, Santa Clause, or a smart blonde.

A prostitute and 2 blondes were standing on a corner in a row. A guy drives up and asks 'how much?' Regular price, 4 bucks, 4 bucks.

A smart blonde, a dumb blonde, the Easter Bunny, and Santa Clause are walking and see a $20 bill on the sidewalk. Which one picked up the $20 bill. The dumb blonde...there is no such thing as Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny, or a smart blonde.

And Finally...
What's black and blue and brunette and laying in a ditch? A brunette that told one too many blonde jokes!