| Communism | You have two cows. The government takes both of them and gives you part of the milk. |
| Socialism | You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. |
| Facism | You have two cows. The government takes both cows and sells you the milk. |
| Nazism | You have two cows. The government takes both your cows then shoots you. |
| Bureaucracy | You have two cows. The government takes both of them, shoots one, milks the other, then pours the milk down the drain. |
| Capitalism | You have two cows. You sell one of them and buy a bull. |
| Democracy | Everyone has two cows, then a vote is taken. Whatever the majority decides to do, you do, and that's no bull. |